Sleep Deprivation

My first COS Duty on Thursday. Gunners' Challenge on Friday - two days of continuous activity. In spite of that, I couldn't sleep properly for two nights running. And being someone who really needs rest all the time, functioning normally proved to be a challenge.

Friday ended late too. We had foreplay @ DXO. Free flow of non-alcholic drinks and an expensive but superb dinner at Glutton's Bay after that, before staying back a while for Ladies' Night. Yes the name of the event sounds pretty pervetic, but the brilliant organisers from HQ Battery were pretty creative - the slogan went something like this, before FATEP, let's play. Hence explaining the name. Well you see, they wanted us to have a bit of fun before the hectic preparation and full swing of FATEP comes along, and before the battalion turns ops and goes on standby.

Saturday was the first Faith Factor of the year. Mentoring and a new class to take. I didn't do too well. Much room for improvement. Need to relax a lot more. I don't know if I'd be able to take much of this tension and stress any longer. Hopefully things can be resolved soon. KFC and Swensens followed. Full but satisfied.

It was my first duty. There were really so many things I didn't know had to be done. Okay, maybe I'm just incompetent. I'm sorry about that. I don't wanna give you extra work. But you didn't have to look at me with those eyes. You always reserve that resigned and belittling look for me. On another note, I can't help but feel inadaquate when I compare myself with some others, who're able to lead so charismatically and to bond so well with their charges. Well, you said things'll get better. I really hope so.

I really hope so.